Paradox

If I go back and time, and all I do is eat some pancakes and blow up some cities, would this change the future?

Wickedness

O Lord God, how long wilt thou suffer that such wickedness and inequity shall be among the people? O Lord, wilt thou give me strength, that I may bear with mine infirmities. For I am infirm, and such wickedness among this people doth chafe my pancakes.

Mastery

Be master of the pancake rather than pancaked by the master.

Permanance

Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my cinnamon roll pancakes on a stick shall never pass away.

Slobs

The only pancakes you find on the tops of mountains are the pancakes left by slobs.

The life of the mind

Even a pancake may instruct a philosopher in the art of icky-sticky-ology.

Dreams

If you can dream it, you can pancake it.

Nutrition

The mouth with which I eat pancakes is the same mouth with which God eats space monsters.

Divinity

So divinely is the world ordered that every one of us, in our place and time, will be eaten with pancakes and juice.

Multiculturalism

In the Swedish pancake's mind, there are many possibilities, but in the English muffin's mind, there are few.

Uncertainty

"First pancake, best pancake"?

Or "Practice makes perfect pancakes"?

Focus on what's important. We're nuking your house.

Anatomy

Three things are needed for success: a backbone, a wishbone, and a pancake-bone.

Sleep

If you sleep with pancakes, you will wake up with dogs, who ate the pancakes. Pretty good trade-off.

Doors

Truly, I say to you, whosoever does not enter the kingdom of God like a pancake shall not fit under the door.

Beauty

Always have something beautiful in sight, even if it's just a pancake or the world's most downloaded woman.

Four hours

If you experience a pancake lasting more than four hours, geez, eat a little faster, buddy.

Public safety

Attacking a pancake is a felony offense, punishable by a fine and over one year in prison.

Please help make our pancakes safer.

Life

If nature is a giant pancake, then life is the swam of cockroaches devouring it.

Freedom

If my heart can become pure and simple like that of a child, I bet I can get these dumbasses to give me free pancakes.

Marriage

It is better to help a pancake than to be helped by a pancake, because what's next, waffles are sleeping with your wife?

God

If it looks like a pancake, walks like a duck, and hisses like a snake, then you need to stop offending God and all that is good and right with your unholy stem-cell creations.

Tombs

The person who opens the tomb of the chosen one will eat no pancakes, because man, that sounds like a busy day.

Great ideas

Pancakes in the bathtub. Not the greatest idea.

Communism

In communist countries, they use shoes for pancakes and pancakes for pets. This is why communism doesn't work.

Insults

If you want to insult a pancake, you have bigger problems than thinking of insults for pancakes. But let me suggest "pancake-wad".

The cosmos

Kittens and pancakes have one thing in common: The mystery of the cosmos. The glory of the spheres! Man, I've got to stop drinking.

Movies

May I compare thee to a pancake? If not, would you like to appear in a tasteful adult movie?

Science

Exorcists believe there are demons inside us. Chefs believe there are pancakes inside us. Will we ever know for sure? Science isn't talking.

The art of war

Never bring a pancake to a gunfight.

Trading

A man will trade his whole kingdom for a single pancake, if he is the king of Diddly-squat-istan.

Tasty

Which sounds tastier? "The pancakes of pestilence" or "A plague of pancakes"?

Market research.