Thursday, June 30, 2011

Pee


Life is like a pancake peed on by Smurfs.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Men


Give a man a pancake, he’ll eat for a day. Then, when he’s passed out from the sedative, you can shave his balls.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Life


Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% eating pancakes at gunpoint with Joe Pesci.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Buddha


When the Buddha ordered a pizza but received a pancake, he became enlightened.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Change


If you don't believe one pancake can change the world, I guess you're not a total moron.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Pans


Making pancakes in a bedpan rarely pans out.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Equality


I believe in equality for everyone, except Canadians, pancakes, children, people who eat ranch dressing, and orcs.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Life lessons


Always have a mind as sharp as a dagger and a pancake as sticky as the sheets in a Bangkok brothel.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Change


No matter how things change, people will always eat pancakes, raise families, and bone your mom.